The V-Spot: How Do I Get Fit To Be Tied?
Dear Yana,
I’ve got some sex stuff on my mind, mostly about BDSM/kink. I’m a kinskter just getting my footing in the local (Western Mass) scene and was wondering what sorts of resources other than FetLife are available. I also wanted to ask about ropes, and what rope you think is good and safe and easy for beginners to practice with.
Additionally, are there specific online sources that are accessible to beginner rope learners? The last thing I’m wondering about is the local scene and play parties. If there are any, how does someone go about getting in touch with these groups?
— Kink Newbie
Dear Newbie,
I’m glad you’re asking such good questions, as any time we set out to learn a new skill, especially those involving kink, we’re taking some physical and emotional risks that are best considered in advance.
First, Crash-Restraint.com is a great, no-cost learning resource, featuring videos from rope pros that walk you through step-by-step demos of basic rope ties. BelleCorde.com is a woman-run site that has good resources for intermediate rope explorers, especially if you’re looking into rope suspension arts and/or tips to negotiating rope scenes, which is of course an essential component.
However, if you’re local to Western Mass, there are a lot of in-person resources for you to check out which, if possible, is always my personal preference for learning new things, especially those that incur a certain amount of risk (which all rope tying does to some extent; it should be noted than anyone can make a YouTube video, so knowing who you’re learning from is important).
With the spirit of informed-learning in mind, I asked Willow Howls, local queer rope artist and shibari instructor located in Western Mass, to help me answer these questions for you!
Y: What local events do you recommend and why?
W: A great way to meet people and learn about a variety of topics is at munches! Most of these events can be found on FetLife if you look for things near where you live. Munches are casual, low-pressure meet-ups for people to gather monthly and discuss a kinky topic. Think of them as nerdy dinner parties for people who are interested in learning about kink-related topics. Educational events happen monthly across Western Mass and their locations tend to change. Attend munches to learn about events other people love going to!
Y: What are your favorite beginner’s rope resources?
W: In-person classes are the best way to learn the ropes! That being said, Showing You the Ropes by the Two Knotty Boys and Shibari You Can Use by Lee Harrington are excellent beginner rope tutorial books that you can buy online. Ties and knots are difficult to learn alone, and I encourage you attend some classes if you’re new.
Y: Do you have any advice for someone attending their first rope event?…continue reading…
