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It’s been a few years since I last got laid. Lately I’ve been trying to use OKCupid to look for a hookup. I also tried using Craigslist personals, but that didn’t go anywhere. While on OKCupid I email women asking if they want to chat, but I don’t get a reply in return. Many don’t even look at the message. I just don’t know what to do anymore.

I’m an introvert and never had that many friends so it hasn’t been easy for me. I used to go out to the bars locally or in downtown Springfield, but I usually ended up doing the driving and didn’t get to socialize much because I’m shy when talking to women.

Do you have any advice on what I could do?

Being a shy, introverted dude attempting to navigate the cocky, charming, testosterone-fueled world of modern hook-up culture isn’t easy. It sounds like online dating could be a really useful tool for you to use as it’s intentionally set up for people to hit on other people from the relative safety of their iPhones — no extroversion required.

However, though you’ve found the right tool to use, perhaps you just haven’t quite learned how to use it well. Just because I took my local sex columnist’s advice and bought a fancy new vibrator, for example, doesn’t mean I’m going to be having incredible orgasms if I don’t first learn how to turn it on, right? Same idea…continue reading…


IMG_8753I’m teaching a workshop this month!

Thursday, July 16th. 7:30-9pm at Oh My Sensuality Shop in Northampton. $12/seat. Limited seating. 18+. Purchase tickets & find out more details here!